Rejection
Back upstairs, I can't fucking believe it. I go to her room and pace, and her empty bed is blasphemous; it doesn't even smell like her. All I can think of is how I will never, ever have her, a simple truth, cold and ancient. Is there anything worse than a girl you love who will basically fuck anyone but you? I doubt it.
Good one, subconscious. Thanks a bunch.
Dreams
I can't sleep. I went to bed at four something, and woke up at eight something. The nightmare was this: we were all in this old house in Illinois that I grew up in, that is now my aunt's. Maybe we were filming. I can't find her, and then I can't find him either. So I go downstairs, and as I descend I already know what's going to happen, and sure enough there they are, camped out on the floor. I think he's genuinely asleep, and clothed, but she's neither. I see them even before I turn the light on, but I pretend ignorance, and the image of her naked form burns my eyes for a blistering two seconds. Sorry, I murmur, before turning it off again, and I think I hear her say something polite and gently outraged, as when you try to open the door of an occupied bathroom. I leave them to their post-coital slumber, they obviously unconcerned.